22/3/21 ^^^This illness is not going away anytime soon

 The best I can do is just contain it with you.  Even Lizzie and the kids don't know the extensiveness of the illness.

With just you, Els is unnecessary.  All I need is one person that I can talk to with regards to this illness.  I already got the blog.  Next is who I should address the writing to.

As long as I can write to you, the[re] (the) rest of the world is unnecessary.  From here on I just focus on being great.

I want to steer away from Els.  Don't want to depend on her too much.  She is nonreciprocating.

As it is, I'm ready to up my game.  This year I really want to do the 21 km Hill Run.

Els is just an incidental.  Therefore I should not burn 4 hours a day on her.  If I feel like it, I write her an email.  Beyond that, she is nothing more than an incidental.

I have to see [] (her) as what she is.

Otherwise, 4 hours a day is wasted just like that.

mm