Basically, I should do my best not to be crazy.
Hanging on to Els is actually a crazy action. I should decide to move on.
If my goals are to be thin and fast, then I should just stick with a sound mind in a sound body. My problem is I want to have a relationship when in the truest sense I actually want to be alone.
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I should not pursue my relationship with Els any further. It is not reciprocating. Furthermore, I am a loner. I like being by myself doing my own thing.
I was never a social animal. I'm not crazy, this is the way I'm wired.
I like being on my own, doing my own thing with a friend like Yati on the side. That constitutes my socializing.
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This mental illness has to stop. I believe I can stop it when I stop trying to fit in.
TraXX and Els are actually my attempt to fit in. Just like Facebook.
Should I decide to be all by myself with only a handful of people to deal with, I will be fine.
mm
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